I don’t really know how to do sadness. I’m a chipper sort of person and I try and make the best of things. To stay cheerful. Optimistic. It’s hard to find from moment to moment. We ride on the momentum of daily life. Barely stopping for a minute to check in with ourselves. Maybe today…

It’s a strange phenomena to go away and come back. I’m fuelled by the transitions between familiar and unfamiliar. At home, since my diagnosis process began (not quite as simple with this sort of cancer) I’d been locked in a cycle of shock, hospital and other people’s shock. A bit like a ballbearing in a…

Last week my husband was telling our twins about my snoring. This is something new and amusing to the family as I have never been a snorer until recently. He suffers patiently and has his wax ear plugs on hand but they are not always enough. It was actually one of the first signs that…

Today is results day. I think I already know the worst but maybe there is worse to come. As an optimist I like to find some sort of positive prospect to hold on to. Today mine is based on very marginal gains that won’t change much, but I am hoping it is secondary breast cancer…

It feels much better to be going somewhere, to have forward, directional motion. It feels good to see the bleak French landscape in February and to stop morosely circulating between my bed, my sofa, hospital and local cafes – all I’ve been able to cope with since the diagnosis two weeks ago. It helps that…